and the hits just keep on coming.....

It's mid December and that means it's cookie time but I am knee deep in seed catalogs.  I have a hard time switching gears.  Stacking the seed catalogs in the ever growing pile, I haul out the recipes for cookies.  I have so many recipes from years of baking cookies.  I have my Moms recipe box, my binder and my recipe box, put to shame by my Moms (the box in the middle).

The essential ingredients get this party started!  

Welcome to the Phat Shack. 

Pulled out the favorites and whittled the list down to the "must haves" "can't live without" cookies.  The list is still too long but I will try my best!  Start slow because cookies just don't show up here like they used to.  They can be frozen and quite a few cookies ship well..... that increases my list again.   Instead of spending hours in the kitchen I am opting to bake one recipe a day until Christmas Eve.  Pack them in containers and whisk them away to the freezer.  The freezer that is in my studio.  I will need to bury the cookies under the pesto and cauliflower.  

Start slow, go with the good old peanut butter cookies.  I bought "natural" peanut butter, the kind that separates in the jar because it's been sitting on the shelf or warehouse for years. Stirring a jar of separated peanut butter is like stirring up a bucket of asphalt driveway sealer.  Hey, I use my big drill for that mess so break out the hand mixer/immersion blender!  

The oil oozed out and down the sides of the jar, I lost my grip.  Oil and peanut butter were on the Tilt-O-Wheel at the county fair!  EJECT!  I was so panic stricken I pulled the plug out of the wall.   This added an extra hour of cleaning and laundry to making simple peanut butter cookies.  Kirby did the dance of happiness and couldn't believe his luck to be in the kitchen at exactly the right time for raining peanut butter!  Life is good if you're a dog here at Paine Falls.  

Slowly I got my groove back for making cookies and it was game on!  I had packages to get in the mail. 

I was moving at lightening speed and just like that the brown sugar hit the floor.  Pixie dust flew everywhere.  Under the wood stove, all over the floor, the carpets.  The velocity of the spillage was truly amazing.  Again Kirby had a ringside seat, although one lick and he retreated to the landing.  Brown sugar needs to be coated in butter to get him excited. 

The floors got washed again and the dog got another bath.  Alas the cookies were baked and sent off packed, bundled and shipped to the four directions! 

Snickerdoodles, Gingersnaps, Melt in Your Mouth Strudel, Russian Tea Cakes and Peanut Butter Cookies. 

Worried I might push myself into a diabetic coma I opted for car repair. That could turn me into an alcoholic.

Replaced both air filters (engine & cab), topped off all the fluid levels, filled the low tires and poked around trying to figure out why my engine light was on.  Ran up to Autozone and had a fresh faced, dirty handed kid plug the computer into the ailing van; it's free!  Well your thermostat is sending a bad signal, we can sell ya one.  Ya, let me go home and watch a couple YouTubes before I commit to that repair.  It's not that I didn't believe the fresh faced lad, eating a candy bar with black oily covered hands at 9:30 am, it's just better to get a second opinion.  I stopped by my favorite mechanic on my way home.  It's like stepping into Mordor from the Lord of the Rings.  His Dad owned the shop and now he owns the shop.  It's like stepping back in time to go visit my Dad at his shop when I was a wee tike.  The fumes of welding torches and diesel fuel transport me back to seeing my Dad's legs under a big garbage truck, while he talked to me.  Open flames, open pits of oozing iridescent fluids, car parts strewn on the counter and floor, I am very comfortable here.  This place is a close runner up to my kitchen after the peanut butter debacle.

The guy who works here is as honest as the day is long and he said; Let's go look at your van.  Yup, it's the thermostat and nope it's not a problem.  The computer sent a code from the thermostat back to the computer, the valve just didn't open fast enough so the engine light went on.  He re-set the computer and said if the engine light comes on again, call me and we can get you in right away, it's a three hour job.  I was charged nothing...... He gets cookies!  

After all this it was time to head to the river! 

I didn't catch a thing but I don't care.  Standing in a river on a December day the pixie dust, diesel fumes and Christmas crazy wash away.  I walk away with my head clean.  Three hours in ice cold water on sunny day is just the best cure for anything that ails the body.  The flicker and the kingfisher kicked up a fuss and I watched until the blue jays bombed in.   When I could no longer feel my feet it was time to head for home.  I miss having a dog to tag along on this trips so maybe that will be on my 2024 "to-do" list.  Kirby could use a buddy.  

Got home late and needed to make a butter run for tomorrows cookies.  Butch decided he wanted to tag along because he is looking for a light up wreath to hang on the front door.  He can't stop himself.  Fine, let's just make one stop so we decided on Sam's Club.  I hate that place!  The only thing that makes it tolerable is Scan & Go.  I don't need to talk to anyone and I can check myself out.  I can also buy giant bags of broccoli and almonds at a good price.  Other than that I don't buy much at that place.  Grabbed the butter and broccoli, Butch grabbed a rotisserie chicken.  Hey, are you hanging that on the front door?  Does it light up?    

Butch decided to make homemade broccoli salad for his sailing club Christmas party the next night.  The rotisserie chicken was sitting on the counter and the broccoli was dumped in the sink for washing and trimming.  I had roasted beets in the oven and left over baked potatoes, a salad was already made from last night.  Easy dinner right?  I’m peeling the beets and tossing them in a bowl when I hear this god awful sound and so much swearing.  He flipped a whole damn rotisserie chicken off the counter, bouncing off the dog, who thought it was manna from the heavens and plopped on the floor!  Grease flew everywhere!  My fast dinner ended up scrubbing down cabinets and floors, scooping grease off the floor with a spatula and trying to beat the dog to the carcass, yelling NO, NO BONES!!!!! I won and Kirby is passed out on the landing from doing cleanup on Aisle One.  I snatched that chicken off the floor so fast Kirby thought it had legs to run away!  I just mopped my floors this morning!!! After the snatch and grab off the floor I ran it under the faucet, patted dry and popped it in a 400 degree oven for 15 minutes.  Ran in the basement, grabbed a jar of peach BBQ sauce and said, DINNER....... while Kirby was doing laps around the kitchen trying to figure out where the chicken went.  For a blind dog his nose is just amazing! 

 If I ever write a recipe book, I'm calling this bouncing chicken! 

Butch is doing laundry and cleaning up his broccoli salad stuff.  I'm washing down the cupboards and floors again.  I just took the last batch of pinwheel cookies out of the oven and headed to bed 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️  walking away, just walking away…..

I found this poor little guy on my walk this morning and wonder if he ate one too many cookies or just couldn't mop one more floor........ le sigh little one.  

God speed..